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Since the school year ended Dash has had the benefit of both of us being around. Kathy never had a Monday-Friday thing as a teacher so she was around more than that, but until May it was me who was spending more time with Dash. Then when she slowed down, I had a flurry of assignments and took the opportunity to work a lot because I could. Not surprisingly, this shift in the household dynamic has led to changes in Dash.

While it was bound to happen sooner or later, he’s now entered his “mommy phase” where my services are mostly no longer required. So now I’ve become like the dad who is gone all day at work and comes home to an indifferent toddler who would rather follow mom around the house than play with dad. Nevermind that I’m still working at home and not really sequestering myself away from the action — years of writing in busy offices has given me the ability to write in the most chaotic of surroundings — but I am focused on computer as opposed to my son. So now I’m playing that traditional role of dad.

At first it was kind of nice to be able to get the time away being the manny. But I’ve gotten used to this parent thing and I admit that there was twinge of envy as I watch Kathy walking out the door to take Dash to Andi’s music class or over to Van Vorst Park for the regular late morning playtime. It just plain sucks if the weather is nice. And it really sucks when it just goes too far. Sometimes he just won’t leave his mother alone, insisting on being held or standing next to her grabbing onto her leg. I stand there looking on helplessly as the poor woman tries to talk on the phone but can’t because this little beast won’t let her go. It’s frustrating for both parents.

I know that more than a few mothers have been crushed by their kid’s rejection. It bothers me and I find myself trying to come up with strategies to get Dash back on the same page as me. Specific activities that we always do together is a good one. Another is find new things to do that I think the kid will like, whether it’s a ride to the car wash (which I loved as a kid) or a trip to a new playground or other kid activity that he’s not experienced before. Activities that all three of us can do together are also good, but he’ll lean more on mom; plus, tying up both parents for an extended non-weekend daytime activity can mean that we fall behind home chores and/or work.

An interesting side story to this is that Dash is becoming interested in other men, which to me is a little weird. Sometimes he refuses to let me push him on the swing, choosing his playmate’s dad instead or mom if she’s handy. He talks about some of our adult male friends, saying their name and some fact about them that he uses as an association. It feels a little weird but I tell myself that its good that he’s able to connect with other people as he’s growing older. Parents who have their kids in day care probably don’t worry so much about it, but I do fear that maybe Dash is just a little bored with me and sometimes even mom because he sees so much of us.

I know this is all just one phase leading into another. But this whole “I’m more interested in other people” phase is something that I expected to happen when he hits puberty, not when he’s a toddler. But as with so many things with a 2 year old, things are changing fast. Two weeks from now, I could be writing about how he won’t leave me alone. I promise I won’t complain.